So this whole writing a blog thing is new to me, okay? I was never one to write in a journal or diary growing up plus I got busy at work? 14-hour days? blah blah blah. excuses excuses excuses. Aaaaaaand we're done with that. On to the post!
Who I am as Friend is quite the topic. I have had many different friends throughout my life. And by the way, this goes for this entire post: I'm not bragging. It's easy for me to get along with just about anybody and I love getting to know about other people. Interestingly enough, the number of friends whom I consider close or best are very few; but more on that later...
I'd like to paint a picture for you of the kind of kid I was growing up...
Over the Summer-Of-Big-Change between fifth and sixth grade, something happened between two of my very good friends and they decided they weren't going to be friends with each other in middle school--kind of run-of-the-mill stuff for pre-teen girls. Well, that bit the dust for me because I always refused to choose sides. So for the first few weeks of sixth grade, I split my lunches up between my two groups of friends. I would go out of my way (who in sixth grade needs a schedule for lunchtime???) to spend time with both groups. Monday, Wednesday, Friday of this week with this group...Tuesday Thursday with that group and next week we switch. I took on this responsibility on my own. I never tried to get the two girls to make up, (I expected them to do that themselves) and I always thought they would see how ridiculous it was what I was doing.
Then one day in late September...it was the second anniversary of my grandpa's death. His death was my first remembered experience I had with death and, being the dramatic 11-year-old that I was, I brought a picture of him to school with me. I was feeling sad all day and I was over trying to play nice between my two groups of friends. So I got up and sat with a completely different group of girls in the lunch room. They welcomed me with open arms, balked at my other friends for sharing me like a child in a divorce and, most important to me, asked me why I was looking so sad. Empathy, sympathy. Those things go a long way with a person...
You see, I get along with different kinds of people because I am good at empathizing with them. I am good at adapting to their styles--their styles of talking, personality, humor, etc. It's not like I change who I am so I can be friends with everyone and make everyone happy. I just like figuring people out and a way to do that is to try to empathize with them. And when I do this, it introduces me to a whole new world of experiences (music, movies, points of view) and I appreciate those experiences because I see them through the eyes my friends. Is this making any sense? Let's go to an example...
I made a new friend about a year ago. He is from the South-ish. The state in which he grew up is not technically considered to be in "The South" but he has a nice southern accent and an easy-going way about him. I had never met anyone like him before and eventually, I learned about his favorite band. So I told him I had heard a song by that band that I really liked and asked him which album he would suggest I listen to first. He proceeded to give me a musical history of this band that he was so passionate about. He was so passionate about this band that I bought two of their albums (the two he suggested) and now I am hooked. I learned what he is passionate about and because I listened and tried to see it from his perspective, I now have an appreciation for this awesome band!
If you talk to most of my friends, they will say that I am easy to get along with. They will say I am a good listener and that I am an easy going, go-with-the-flow kind of girl. But those friends I consider my best and closest friends, know who I am underneath. It's not like I'm not any of those things. It's just that they know me on my base level, before any adaptation occurs. When I juxtapose my close and not-so-close friendships, who I am shows through in sharp relief.
Well, this turned out to be more of a journal entry/therapy session than a blog post, but hey, it's my blog and I just want you all to get to know me. Although, I'm pretty sure I only have one reader anyway and she already knows what's up... :) Until next time...
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